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Why do I have to pay to talk to a therapist?

Updated: May 6, 2022



“The fee is an ever – present reminder that the therapeutic relationship is not a friendship, is not a family relationship, and is not a romantic relationship…. A therapy that is being provided in essence for free…, may convey a message to the patient that what is being provided is not worth much.” (Gabbard et al. 2017)


Unlike other relationships in our life, our relationship with our therapist will not be punishing, dictatorial, overindulgent or passive. It will have real qualities of warmth and acceptance for all parts of you – the ‘good’ and the bad. So, when we can expose our ‘bad parts’ and still feel accepted, that can be a corrective experience.

But for us to take this relationship seriously, to put in the work that therapy takes & to not take the therapist for granted, like we do our loved one, there has to be a fee. Just like with a doctor or even a spiritual retreat.

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